Are you and your bestie constantly chatting back and forth no matter how busy your lives get? Or are you relegated to an occasional "Hey!" or "'Sup?" If it's the latter, you might be in need of a little bit of help. Use these ideas to get your BFF to giggle, blush, sigh, or literally LOL. Because she's worth it.
1. The Secret Agent
Just like with romantic relationships, sometimes you and your best friend might occasionally feel the need to spice things up. But let's face it: you can't hit the bars all night like you used to, social events are always so tedious, and Netflix isn't going to binge itself. Perhaps a made-up adventure will be enough to sate your need for excitement, at least for tonight.
Oh, and don't forget to inform your friend that this is all a jest… eventually.
2. Take Her Down a Peg
Your best friend is the greatest human being you know. She understands you so well and never forgets your birthday or the anniversaries of all your accomplishments together. But sometimes she needs to be taken down a peg or two, don't you think? Just remember, it's all in good fun. Right? Right?
3. Flattery Will Get You Everywhere
In a recent scientific study, textologists discovered that requests to meet up for lunch account for 95% of all texts between close friends. When scientists uncover your phone 1,000,000 years from now, do you really want to bore them with 12 gigabits worth of second meal requests? Dare to be different. Future generations will thank you.
4. The Targeted Humiliation Attack
Don't fret; it's not because she doesn't like you. Or that she doesn't adore you above all others - including her parents, husband and kids, and everybody else she's ever met. The reason you weren't invited to this particular social gathering is because it's going to be a ton of people from her work and you wouldn't know a soul.
Then again, that's what your logical mind should be thinking. What you're really thinking is: She. Will. Pay. And maybe she'll leave her phone lying around where one of her guests might see it.
5. The Excessive Emoji Drop
Best Friend's Handbook Rule #1: If you can't have entire conversations with your bestie using emojis and only emojis without understanding every last word, you're not really best friends.
6. The Passive Aggressive Reminder
Sure, you love your best friend to pieces, and you love each of those pieces equally and without discrimination. But sometimes she can be extremely dense, and isn't that the most frustrating thing? Sometimes you can tell her something ad nauseam and she still doesn't hear it until her selective little mind deems it necessary information. And yet you can't get mad at her, because then she'll find a way to make it all your fault.
So, when texting about something you've been mentioning since Bryant Gumbel was still on The Today Show, just remember: there's the right way, the wrong way, and the all-too-effective passive aggressive way.
7. The Onomatopoeia
Texting is hard work. Wait…what? Texting is hard, because the medium is entirely text-based (hence the name), and it is often difficult to express emotions in messaging.
In the physical world, using your vocal intonations and body language are quick and clean ways to express notions such as sarcasm, frustration, shame, envy, and love. These non-verbals are also great for simpler, yet harder to express concepts like those strange body noises your significant other makes when he thinks nobody is around.
So, it's time to start a movement legitimizing onomatopoeia in texts. How else are those closest to us supposed to know how we really feel? (rolls eyes)
8. Fun With Science
Typoglycemia is the recent discovery that the human brain is capable of reading and processing scrambled words so long as the first and last letters remain in place. This was a popular meme and email chain a few years back and really illustrates what it means to be human.
It's also a superb way to show your pesky autocorrect what for. If you never spell words correctly, how will it ever correct you? Come on, folks; let's outsmart all those machines striving toward the singularity, before it's too late.
9. The Food Exhibitionist
We live in some oddball times. Do you think that if in your grandparents' day, someone went around taking photos of his food and showing them to everyone, your grandpa wouldn't have marched up to that weirdo and popped him in the nose?
That's not to say you should stop taking snapshots of your meal and texting them to your best friend, because it certainly is a lot of fun. Sorry, Granddad.
10. The Anticipatoriator
Has this happened to you? You really want to reach out to your best friend because you haven't spoken to her in a while and you want to touch base? But then, once you pull out your pocket-sized text message machine, you realize you have absolutely nothing to say. No worries, all you need to do is start talking, and eventually, the words will come. Or hopefully your BFF will chime in with something interesting. That is her job, after all.
Make Her Laugh
When you and your bestie get together, you have great conversations. There's no reason your texting should be any different. Get creative to really make her laugh...or blush.
